William Jewell College Theater Department Launches "Canon for Racial Reconciliation" Musical Play in Bid to Show Case Racial Sensitivity.
In an astounding display of virtue signaling, William Jewell College, a bastion of progressive academia, unveiled its latest groundbreaking venture to confront the alleged sins of the past. And just when you thought the quest for political correctness couldn't get any more ridiculous, the commission announced its masterpiece: the "Canon for Racial Reconciliation." Move over Beethoven, there's a new virtuous composer in town!
This musical "opus" is intended to bring together the unsuspecting students of William Jewell's music department with not one but two local semiprofessional vocal groups, known as Ordained and Cardinalis. Because nothing says "reconciliation" like merging the virtuous voices of academia with singing fat ladies *ahem* excuse me "professional performers" who are sure to absolutely thrill audiences about this endeavor.
In April 2021, the institution proclaimed the formation of a "Racial Reconciliation Commission." According to the college's overly virtuous and politically correct website, this commission's noble mission is to hunt down and dramatically announce the "truth" about the college's racial history. Because, as we all know, nothing says "progress" quite like dredging up ancient grievances and dwelling on the sins of those long gone.
One can only imagine the profound impact this choral work will have on local aficionados of classical music. Will it finally put an end to all racial disparities, ushering in an era of unprecedented harmony? Or perhaps it will just join the long list of absurd college theater productions that make us wonder, "What were they thinking?" Only time will tell!
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