Staley High Coach Convicted of Statutory Rape, Gets Probation Only. No Jail Time.


Oh, what a heartwarming tale of trust, innocence, and the impeccable moral compass of educators! In a stunning display of justice, former Staley High School coach Joshua Hood, has been found guilty of second-degree statutory rape after an undoubtedly thorough multi-day trial in Clay County Circuit Court. How heartening to see the legal system working tirelessly to protect the vulnerable.

Hood's dastardly career of ill deeds spanned various school districts, each of which, of course, had no inkling of his alleged misdeeds. The districts were shocked, shocked, I tell you, when they learned about the charges through the ever-reliable media.

According to those pesky court documents, the alleged incident occurred in Hood's home in 2010, involving a then-15-year-old female student. But fear not, dear reader, for Hood valiantly took the stand to declare, with tears of innocence, that he absolutely did not engage in such inappropriate activities. His supportive wife even testified that she couldn't recall the girl ever gracing their home with her presence. A true family man, no doubt.

The victim, however, had the audacity to share a different version of events, breaking down in tears as she recounted the alleged assault in Hood's home. But hey, who needs the truth when we have conflicting testimonies and a compelling drama unfolding?

Kudos to the victim's friends for their loyalty, who, despite learning about the alleged assault as early as 2010, decided to keep mum out of sheer respect for the victim's wishes. Because, clearly, protecting the alleged perpetrator is what friends are for.

And let's not forget the profound wisdom of Clay County Prosecuting Attorney Zach Thompson, who, after the verdict, eloquently stated that we should all be able to send our kids to school without worrying that the people we trust will turn out to be their abusers. Well said, Captain Obvious!

But fear not; justice has been served elsewhere! Hood, being the model citizen he is, was previously indicted in 2021 in Jackson County. Only days before his Clay County conviction, Hood graciously pleaded guilty to a delightful assortment of charges in Jackson County, involving statutory sodomy, attempted statutory rape, statutory rape, and child molestation involving a different victim. Quite the resume. For these prior crimes in Jackson County, Hood received a suspended prison sentence, a generous serving of probation, and a side order to relinquish his teaching certificate. Oh, the sacrifices one must make for the pursuit of justice!

In conclusion, we can all rest easy knowing that Hood faces up to seven years in prison for the Clay County conviction, with the jury magnanimously recommending a mere five years. Because when it comes to the safety of our children, a little leniency never hurt anyone. Bravo, justice system, bravo!


Anonymous said…
FALSE! The jury recommended a sentence of five years in the Missouri Department of Corrections. The next court date scheduled for sentencing will be on Feb. 21, 2024, at 3 p.m.
Anonymous said…
That’s what he ended with. Five stinking years. Also a note there is no minimum sentence. He could get paroled in a yr! What a fabulous justice system we have!